Today marks one month since mom passed. One month ago at this very time, she was receiving last rites from Father Mark. Over and over in my head I have wanted to blog about every last detail of September 3rd, but I haven't. I'm afraid that I will forget something, but really, how can you forget your mom's last breath?
Since mom passed, I gave birth to a beautiful little flower named Elise Kimberly. 13 days after ma passed. The next day, I was on Zoloft. I've blogged about this before, it makes me feel like a robot. I don't feel as though I've been mourning mom since I am drugged out now. And have a newborn. It's all just too too much, right?
I'm afraid that mom is going to come to me in a dream, but that I won't remember it in the haze of nursing at 4 in the morning. I don't think that's possible though...I think it took my dad just a bit to come and visit me. I am hoping to see mom soon.
So, the day my mom died will be told soon. I guess I'm just not ready to put the words to paper yet. I remember everything. It's so hard to believe that I haven't talked to my mom in one month. Mind blowing. I miss you. Terribly.