Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Family dynamics

In my therapy last night, we were talking about families and how they deal with cancer. This was brought up because I was telling the group about my last post (mom wanting to only tell Kasey, NOT her other sisters). I told the group that this annoyed me and made me feel "less" of a family member. Why should mom leave me out of a health situation? I was the one who switched her doctor, I have been the one to go to all the appointments, I am the one who takes all the notes.

We were talking about how sometimes families that are apart come together, are already together to fight this as a united front, or just don't talk about it. Each person around the room had a different family than mine. Some kinda similar, some very much different.

And then someone said something that stopped me in my tracks.

Families are like chemotherapy drugs. We may have the exact same disease, but treat it in wildly different ways.

This made sense to me. The couple next to me are the ones that are kinda similar to me. Their family dynamic is the same (mom, dad, 3 daughters). Their 42 year old daughter has stage four breast cancer as my mom has. BUT my mom and their daughter have no where near the same treatment plan. Therefore, they have a different experience and perception of the disease. They act different as a family unit.

I find that it is hard for me to explain all of my feelings right now, but I wanted to make sure to jot this nugget down. It's important to me. I feel like this one is a keeper.

Cancer is exhausting, but my caregiver support group has truly from my self. My mind is more clear and I have the coping skills to begin to fight this beast. In honor of The Gathering Place, I am fundraising on behalf of them. If you are so inclined, click here, read my story and help others like my mom and me!

Until next time.....

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